"hollywood is a fickle mistress," i said after looking up the term "fickle mistress" to double check that it means what i think it means.
let me spin you a tale, dear reader. a tale of shondaland legend. the tale of "michelle"...
so, like, michelle was working as an assistant at scandal. and then she started working at grey's as a writer. and then, a few months later, she was pulled back to scandal to work as a writer there.
the problem, dear reader, is that i really liked michelle. we spent all of our time together. i mean, not all of our time. just 10am-6pm. and just while we were at work. and our other co-workers were there. okay, so we just worked together. but we had a lot in common and enjoyed a lot of the same things, but now she is dead to me. hence, the tombstone.
just kidding. that would be weird and over-the-top. the tombstone was just because it was halloween, and me and another friend dressed up as michelle and pretended to be her...
nothing weird or over-the-top there.
but the tombstone was part-halloween and part-see ya never. nobody blames michelle for leaving grey's. she didn't have any choice in the matter. i just think, maybe, she could have been more sad about it. if she was, maybe the cake wouldn't have been so mean.
that's not true. it would have been just as mean no matter what. i pulled the same shit when nancy left. look, if you don't want a mean cake made about you, don't fucking leave me. it's pretty simple, y'all.
if i didn't have a giant knot in my shoulder, i would give myself a pat on the back for that 2015-2015 joke. and look at that grass! and that spider! and the font that kind of looks like bones! this is pinterest-level shit.
and, also, for whatever reason, i made the cake itself green... probably just trying to be spooky-scary for halloween, i guess. although, nothing was scarier than my boss eating like four pieces of this cake and the crumbs with his bare hands.
TOTAL DECORATING TIME: 2.5 hours + 1 pair of white knockoff birkenstock sandals that i only wore once for the "michelle" costume. will trade for a philly cheesesteak or best offer.
daughter, writer, traitor,