"elmo" - tommy john (not the surgery or the player)

i’m writing this on a plane. a historic first for sassy badger. a historic? an historic? the plane ticket cost a couple hundred bucks, so it’s an expensive for fucking sure.

a couple years ago, i made this cake which shows my friends’ dog and their unborn baby. fetus cakes have sort of become my specialty. and honestly, i’m not mad about it. anyway, here’s the cake…

then, a couple months ago (always prompt with these updates), i made a cake for the child depicted in the above cake. and now he is no longer unborn but, rather, born, and i have to say… he looks JUST like the prebirth cake rendering that i did.

alright, so before the kid was a baby. but now he’s a baby who is two years old because that is how growing up works. and his parents threw him a birthday party because i guess he did the growing up thing well enough, and they thought he deserved it. good job, kid!

sorry, I just took a 30 minute break to watch aladdin. the new one. because i’m on a plane, remember? so, please take a 30 minute break before reading the rest of this post to get the full effect.

and we’re back! anyway, so this kid had a sesame street themed party. specifically an elmo party. cliché, am I right?

but that’s fine because decorating elmo is a cakewalk…

Cakewalk…

Cake………………………..

elmo is a red blob with a weird smile and some eyes. boom. done. but in researching elmo, i learned that elmo is also the voice of a generation. which generation? i don't know, but here’s a quote from elmo:

"elmo is so happy to see you! welcome to sesame street!"

like… what?? that just cleared my skin, bought me a car, gave me student loan debt, and then forgave it. elmo and sesame street are real af on main or whatever the kids are saying these days.

TOTAL DECORATING TIME: 3 hours + 6 breakfast tacos consumed at the party. toddler birthdays are lit, man.

tickle me,

sassy badger